Rejected...Oh Wait...Accepted!

I recently got word that three of my pieces have been accepted into the Society of Illustrators Los Angeles Annual Illustration Show. This welcome news comes on the heels of complete rejection at the NY Society of Illustrators just a week ago.

While I am always disappointed whenever my work doesn't get accepted in any particular show, I have resigned myself to the fact that any given juried show is highly subjective. Different juries have different tastes and I have absolutely no control over their opinions. These same pieces were ignored in New York while making the cut in L.A. Go figure. But this is not an uncommon scenario and other artists have voiced the same frustrations. Rejection even varies from year to year in the same competition. I have had a piece get the ax two years in a row and then win an award on the third attempt. I have diligently tried to brush off the numerous rejections over the years, Though it never feels good, I have stopped moping around for days on end feeling sorry for myself. In fact this year, for several days I didn't even mention the NY snub to my wife and then, it was only in passing. This new maturity level made the acceptance in L.A. feel a little more satisfying. I think that these competitions with their frequent rejections and occasional successes are a microcosm for life. I have over the years started to worry less about stuff that is beyond my control and focus more on things that I might actually be able to do something about. Things like doing my best work, working hard as well as smart and shutting down shop to be with family more often.

There is a great line from the film "Bridge of Spies" in which the convicted KGB spy Rudolf Abel, played brilliantly by Mark Rylance, is asked if he is worried. He replies "Would it help?" I'm learning to let stuff go when worrying about it won't help. Maybe I am finally learning to be a grown up.

Previous posts about this project can be seen here, here and here.

Why You Should Ride the Rejection Train

Years ago, I decided to take a ride on the Art Train. To a young naive art student, it sounded so exciting to take this trip. Exotic destinations, accolades, fabulous wealth, fame, permanent placement in museums of world renown. I bought my ticket and jumped on board. I chugged merrily along in my wide eyed naivete, enjoying new projects and challenges, paying my dues and improving my craft. Someday it would pay off, I assured myself. It was going to be a long trip but I was in it for the long haul. Some of the stops were memorable, like my first picture book or the first time I got my work in Communication Arts. Others not so much, but those are subjects for another post, or no post at all.

I've been on the train for a long time now. Every now and again the ticket taker comes along and asks for my ticket. Ticket? I know I bought one, way back when I boarded the train.Where is it? But Mr. Ticket Man insists that if I don't have one, I must get off the train. I scramble through my pockets searching in vain, but nothing I do makes the ticket materialize. It has vanished- Poof- into thin air. Like a punch to the gut, I realize I'm not going to be making it to the next stop. I have to get off. That's what rejection feels like.

I used to take rejection very personally. If someone didn't like my art or had something negative to say about it, I felt like I was a failure. My art was an extension of who I was and it hurt. I have since grown much more philosophical about rejection. I have learned something from the countless "no thank yous" I have endured over the years and it is this:

The fact that I got rejected says much more about the person rejecting me than it does about me.

I heard it once said that we should learn to love and embrace rejection because it points out to us those people that have no desire to align themselves to our visions and passion. If we don't let them clutter our lives with doubt or keep holding out hope that someday they will come around, we can make room to find the people that will allow us to progress and succeed. Find your believers and along the way, I think the key is to keep working. 

I have entered and been rejected by countless professional illustration shows over the years. Once in a while I get something in, but I had long since given up wishing for a Gold Medal. For years I held that up as some sort of Holy Grail. I thought that if I could somehow earn one of them, I'd be on my way. After enough rejection, I decided to change destinations. Just do good work and enjoy it, I thought. That's enough. Well, a few weeks ago, I found out I won a Gold Medal from SILA- the Society of Illustrators Los Angeles for my illustration Grasshopper Hunter. Sometimes you get what you want when you stop wanting it so badly.

It feels nice, I will not lie, but it's not what defines me as an artist anymore. I still have a lot of things to create and things to prove to myself, even if nobody else cares. But it's not about the destination anymore. It's about the journey. I have to create the art that I want to create, to make the paintings that I can't wait to get into the studio to work on. I need to do the things that make me smile with satisfaction when the signature goes on. Outside voices will never give you that inner validation. You have to give it to yourself. Of course you should never ignore or summarily reject any criticism of your work that accompanies rejection. It should be analyzed and dissected with the intent of using it to improve your work, but do it in a non emotional way. Some may be subjective, but some will be helpful. As difficult as it may be, you have to separate your personal identity from your creative output. Don't take criticism personally. Keep riding the train and polishing your work and sooner or later, you will find yourself always with ticket in hand and looking forward to your next exciting stop. All aboard!